Like a bird on the wire.

I've tried in my own way, to be free.


WARNING this is a pretty depressing blog, not like my usual self-loving posts. But I think this will have a happy ending, we shall see:

So, friends, I have to admit that despite my verbal swagger, and my seemingly bubbly tone I am a fucking hot mess as of late. I cry all the time, I fall asleep while I'm trying to finish homework, I yell, I scream, I basically have temper tantrums. It's honestly, pathetic. But something that my mama and something that I guess, I've even taught myself is- we all have days like this, and we all even have months, years, or weeks like this. But, we have to find a way to seek the help that we need.

I started seeing a psychologist for free at William Paterson. It's a pretty sweet deal, what's better than free mental health? Nothing! But, again, NOTHING comes for free. I cry way more than I want to, and sometimes reveal things about myself that I don't like, or would like to forget. But, how can we have physical health, and financial wealth, without having mental health? We truly can't. I can't be of mind, body, and soul--without a stable mind.

A few things that are proven to help increase your mood: Yoga, chocolate, wine, running, friends, family, reading, napping, psychology, psychedelic drugs (though I don't recommend that), tea, jumping rope, swimming, & exercise of any kind.

I have to increase my endorphins, I know that that might be a huge reason I've been so down--I haven't been hitting up the gym as I normally do.

The point of this post is for me to vent, but to also let you know that-

all those times you've been sad, I've been sad too.

All those times you've been lonely, I've been lonely too.

I love you all, let us all start learning how to love ourselves again.

Let us begin the week of RADICAL SELF LOVE. I'll see you there.

Update blog, a bit early.

Not to prematurely shoot my load, but, I weighed myself this morning and I'm feelin pretty good about it, especially since I've been eating WAY over my limits this past week. -2.5 pounds.

It ain't trickin if yah got it.

The sun drips down like honey.

Honey! Lets talk about the health benefits of honey & my new obsession with: eating it, calling people it, using it on my face, etc... Let me break it down to ya:

There are 3 key benefits that honey can provide you. The first one being: Honey is natures 'energy booster' what this means is honey has a natural way of boosting your metabolism, which then increases your energy. Honey is full of (good) carbohydrates and fruit sugar, which, in moderation, is wonderful for you! Take a spoonful of honey before your workout (like I do) and it will help you boost your workout maybe an extra few steps or even an extra mile.

The second, and most impressive, health benefit is it's "immunity system builder" properties. Honey’s antioxidant and anti-bacterial properties can help improve your digestive system and help you stay healthy enough to fight off disease. It was even written in many articles that Honey, though it can't cure cancer, can be used as a preventative. Honey possesses carcinogen-preventing and anti-tumour properties. Those smart bees.

The third, and probably most useful to my readers, is that honey can be used as a....HANGOVER REMEDY! See, Mama always takes care of you. When you have a headache or another ailment from drinking too much the night before, combat that shit with HONEY! Honey is gentle enough on the stomach and it contains a mix of natural sugars (fructose) which is known to speed up the oxidation of alcohol by the liver, acting as a 'sobering' agent. *Fun fact about bee's: Bee's are drawn to the smell of alcohol and actually get drunk if they have a taste. Outside of the bee hive there are "bouncer bee's" which do exactly that, when they see that some bee's are coming back to the hive drunk, they kick them out and sometimes kill them. Oh, bee's!!
(Let's see who brings in more honey, BZZ)

And a recipe for perfect skin that my mother taught me is:
2 TBSP Honey
1 Mashed Banana
2 TSP salt
Combine in a bowl and rub on your face. The salt acts as an exfoliant, where the honey and the banana act as cooling/masking agents. Leave on for 5 minutes. Then proceed to wash, or lick, off of your face. (JK don't lick it). You'll feel silky smooth. NOT for people with acne! (For people with acne switch out the banana for TOMATO, the acid in tomato's is amazing for troubled skin).

I love honey, this week I'm going to try to use it as much as I can, but again, all in moderation. Honey is high in calories, but if used responsibly it is totally, 100% fine. Put it in your tea, use it instead of sugar while baking, put it in your greek yogurt, or just take a spoonful. Enjoy the benefits that this delicious treat has to offer you.

Update photo's. As promised.

"I love my bitches, I love my bitches, All my bitches we all ambitious."
-Trina

Obviously no drastic changes, also thats me showing off my "muscles" and "toughness" after a really intense work out.

On my way to grandma's for dinner, and even though it's raining, I'm running there instead of driving. Then yoga from 8-9 tonight.

MAMA